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| Who has the worst Twitter? Photo via Freepik |
I know my reputation as one of Wrestling Twitter's foremost leftists will expect you to think the answer would be one of those terrible, neoliberal shill #StillWithHer accounts or alt-right Nazi fucker/sympathizer accounts. Granted, Roosh "Literal Rapist" V, Bill "Trump Is Daddy" Mitchell, Jill "Black People Should Stop Making Babies So I Can Gentrify Kenya More Easily" Filipovic, Ian Miles "Fascist Ants" Cheong, Arthur "Centrist Ants" Chu, Peter "Death Squad" Daou, Mike "Literally Marketing PCP As a Nootropic Stack" Cernovich, Joy Anne "I Cite Anime Nazi News Sites" Reid, and countless other terrible political accounts are all trash. However, the real blight on Twitter are the stupid content thieves or inspirational celebrity "parody" accounts. The worst, by far, is "The Real Banksy," a "fan account" that has 1.6M followers and posts nothing but pseudo-inspirational pap. I mean, the actual Banksy, whom no one has ever seen for real, peddles faux-intellectual cynicism disguised as depth, but his utterly boring street-art at least has some basis in originality. I doubt he'd be on Twitter peddling aphorisms that your aunt used to e-mail you in the heyday of AOL in 2001.Worst Twitter account?— A Tired Black Man (@francisadujr) July 12, 2017
It absolutely was, especially since, and my memory could be betraying me here, it wasn't necessarily based on fat-shaming John Tenta and just putting over how he smartly used his heft to be a dominant force. In modern WWE, he'd in no way work in that milieu. A wrestler named Earthquake today would be the butt of fat jokes, even if John Tenta himself, may he rest in peace, fuck cancer, would probably thrive in today's WWE. He was a great big-man worker by any standard, and WWE allowing guys like Kevin Owens and Samoa Joe reign over their respective brands leads me to believe if Tenta came up today, he'd be a huge star.OK, in retrospect, Earthquake was a pretty good gimmick, right? #TweetBag— Star of Savage (@StarOfSavage) July 12, 2017
You son of a... AAAAHHHHHHIs a taco a sandwich? #Tweetbag— David Kincannon 🎙👞 (@dwkii) July 12, 2017
(It is loosely a sandwich, and more a folded up pizza, but either way the taco is in a strange demilitarized zone between sandwiches and non-sandwiches and I have said too much.)
The answer clearly is Toad. They're the yeoman of the Mushroom Kingdom. Mario gets all the glory. Peach is bougie. Luigi has a cult following. Bowser is also bougie and also a ruthless dictator whose kids seem like dicks. Toad does all the hard work. They'd probably slam down a beer or two and have really fascinating stories of digging up sand really fast in Subcon or doing all Mario's heavy work in outer space.Which character from the Mario universe would you most want to have a beer with, and why?— Nick Christakos (@nick36c) July 12, 2017
From protected user @adamsgroove:
What do you hope to see from the upcoming Mae Young Tournament in NXT, or the G1 Climax in NJPW? (your choice)For the Mae Young Classic, I just hope that it's a great tournament with no BS like the Cruiserweight Classic was. As for the winner, the names I've seen announced or rumored all look good. My inner Chikara fan is pulling for Abbey Laith, but really, I'd be down for anyone winning. For the G1 Climax, I'm not sure how much of it I'm going to be able to watch. I'm hoping for a lot material to go back and watch, either via New Japan World or the AXS TV show, and I'm personally rooting for either Tomohiro Ishii (not likely), Kenny Omega (very likely), or Tetsuya Naito (probably the favorite) to win it.