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| Criminally misused Photo Credit: ImpactWrestling.com |
First up, good little android @robot_hammer asks if a promotion could exist just out of TNA's discarded talent.
Let's see... Luke Gallows, Amazing Kong, the Young Bucks, Ayako Hamada, El Generico, Cheerleader Melissa, Nikki Roxx, Lisa Marie Varon, Sam Shaw, Jesse Sorensen, Val Venis, Orlando Jordan, Daffney, Alex Shelley, Elijah Burke, Sarah Stock, Roderick Strong, Jay Lethal, Amazing Red, Homicide, Thea Trinidad, Doug Williams, Scott Steiner, Consequences Creed, Petey Williams, Matt Morgan, Taylor Wilde, Ashley Lane, Angelina Love, Booker T, Stevie Richards, Shawn Daivari, Jesse Neal, Cody Deaner, Brian Kendrick, The Nasty Boys, Shannon Moore, Taeler Hendrix, Alex Silva, Joey Ryan, Kid Kash, Mikael Judas, Raven, Rhyno, Christina von Eerie, Becky Bayless, Kazuchika Okada, Tommy Dreamer, Adam Pearce, Kevin Nash, Evan Markopoulos, Rob van Dam, Ivelisse Velez, Brian Cage... yeah, I think you can carve a decent roster out of those names.
@PatrickEhland asks how delicious the Romo-freude will be this year.
I honestly cannot gauge this because I am so biased. Sometimes, I think I prefer hate-watching the Cowboys to watching the Eagles. I'm diseased, and I don't want a cure. Anyway, Jason Garrett is on a total hot seat, and Dez Bryant is getting pumped up by the national media as the next big offensive threat. Those elements coming together means Romo is going to get so much rope to hang himself this year. If track record holds? I think we might get epic levels of Romo-freude this year, starting with the opener against the Giants.
Longtime blog fan and former podcast guest Samantha Allen wants to know what my Egyptian Pharaoh name would be.
Rutentutenfreshenfruitenkamen
@OkoriWadsworth asks who the first wrestler I'd like to see join up with Daniel Bryan would be.
The easy answers would be Dolph Ziggler, The Big Show, or The Miz. I don't want easy answers here. I want Zack Ryder to be the one who breaks the seal on Bryan support. Right now, the big guys are way too cowardly to step forward because they value their jobs. Ryder's been systematically broken down, beaten up, held back. Everything that has made him unique since he was repackaged as Long Island Iced Z a long time ago on ECW has been stripped away. Plus, he has real life rumored tensions with Triple H as boss. The only thing he has left to lose is a job he hates, right?
So, why not let him be the first to come to Bryan's aid? Let Ryder, the downtrodden former cult phenom, show the way to go and let the bigger stars see how goddamn foolish they acted. If nothing else, the move will let him do what he does best - wrestle - and it will give Team Bryan a fifth member for their Survivor Series team against the corporate raiders of Randy Orton, The Shield, and RED BELLY.
Scott T. Holland of the Irresistible vs. Immovable blog poses this frozen treat smackdown: Frozen Yogurt vs. Ice Cream vs. Frozen Custard.
If I could be pedantic, I would choose none-of-the-above for first place because of frozen dairy desserts, gelato is king. Italy's contribution to the fray is so smooth and luxurious, and I've found it to be more flavorful. Ice cream is second, because I do prefer some texture. Frozen custard is third, and frozen yogurt is fourth.
His second question is what I would do to bolster Survivor Series' reputation among the "Big 4" shows.
WWE can do what I think they're doing this year - using the event as a midpoint in a longterm story to get some catharsis without blowing their load for WrestleMania. They seem to be telegraphing a four-on-four or five-on-five main event traditional elimination tag team match, and I bet the endgame will be Daniel Bryan tapping out Randy Orton, just to set up an impossible situation that requires Bryan to win the Royal Rumble (or Elimination Chamber match) to get his shot. In years down the line, the show can be used to help build up new guys, or provide something different on top than the usual "John Cena/CM Punk/Daniel Bryan/Sheamus overcomes the odds" shtick they've adopted as SOP for the last forever. That traditional Survivor Series match is the key, just like the Rumble match is the draw in January.
@vajrabhrt asks all about Big Show, his performance on Smackdown, how long I've followed him, and when he got this good.
As I wrote on Instant Feedback the other night, I thought his performance was excellent. Show has always shown signs of being good, even when he was shoved into the main event in WCW after the bare minimum time of training in the Power Plant. I don't think he put it completely together until around the time he was feuding with Money Mayweather into WrestleMania. Since then, he's consistently been one of the top performers on the roster. I haven't seen enough pre-Mania III Andre the Giant to know whether Show is the best big man of all-time, but he's probably the best one I've seen.
@BrianPickett asks if a horse could ever be WWE Champion.
Only this horse.
@robot_hammer is back with a comparison. Now that Bryan Cranston has been cast as Lex Luthor, which character of his is more evil, Luthor or Walter White?
Luthor and White are different kinds of evil, so comparing the two could be hard. Luthor obviously gets the nod on megalomania and mass destruction. However, I can't imagine someone like Luthor actually existing. Sure, megalomania is real, but it usually takes the form of politicians who don't attack open targets. White's evil might seem like small potatoes in comparison. He got caught up in illicit drug trade, and as his desire to get to the top grew, he murdered a bunch of people. Sure, they were confined within a small area, but this kind of evil is relatable, believable. So, do you go with the realistic confined danger, or the imaginary supervillainy? I'll go with Walter White. Go with the devil who can exist.
Total Divas recapper and staff stalwart Trey Irby asked if Washington State could have beaten Auburn yesterday, please? #RollTide
Well, Washington State didn't beat Auburn yesterday, but the game was close. But hey, at least Wazzu fans were able to deal one Auburn bar a pretty humiliating loss.
@mikepankowski asks what my top five current favorite beers are.
I posted a top ten list on the food blog a little while ago. The order remains the same on the top five or so, no matter how much I try to debate otherwise. Rather than cop out, I'll post my Untappd ranking page. Discrepancies might exist, but hey, tastes change, I suppose.
@fairbeezy asks if I were to pick one wrestler to represent the United States against invading aliens for the fate of the human race, whom would I select?
The knee-jerk answer would be Daniel Bryan, because he's the answer for everything. But honestly, if I could pick just one wrestler, it wouldn't be Bryan, but Brock Lesnar. Why? Because all I gotta do is give him like three Jimmy John's sandwiches, and he'll be able to go into destroy mode and take down an entire alien fleet, let alone destroy anyone in hand-to-hand combat, right? (First person to bring up his MMA career gets shot with an arrow.)
@el_spriggs asks if Daniel Bryan, CM Punk, John Cena, and Damien Sandow were to open restaurants like Abdullah the Butcher, what would they serve?
Bryan - The Beard's Dessert Cafe - A quaint and cozy bakery/gelateria that specializes in cupcakes and other one-to-three bite desserts. Even though he's not Vegan anymore, he would offer plenty of vegetarian, Vegan, and gluten-free options, because he knows his fandom is wide ranging.
Punk - Punk's Pizza - Chicago-style pizzeria in the heart of New York, combining his love of Chicago cuisine and trolling millions of people misanthropically. Of course, the venture would be a massive success, because no matter how much he spews hate towards you, you still love him. Yes, YOU.
Cena - A bunch of Applebees franchises across the country.
Sandow - The Vitriolic Gastronome - Think dinner and a theater. Fine dining fare where the servers tell you how much of a disgusting troglodyte you are.
His second question is to pick any ensemble comedy and recast it with wrestlers.
Let's go with The Hangover. Doug would be played by John Cena, for reasons to be revealed later. Phil is level-headed, the brains of the operation, so he's CM Punk. Who cares if the movie's about getting piss drunk? I'm sure Punk can play along for the role. Stu seems to act the craziest when he's drunk, but is full of regret and worry when he's hung over. He's Steve Austin. Daniel Bryan plays Allen, and not just because they both have righteous beards. Sid is played by Sid, just because the idea of Daniel Bryan's dad being played by the Master... AND THE RULER... of the World, is hilarious to me. Rachel Summerlyn would play Jade, Kazuchika Okada plays Mr. Chow, Mark Henry plays Mike Tyson, and Black Doug is Darren Young. I TOLD YOU THERE WAS A PAYOFF.
@wildvulture has two questions. First, if I could pick one pay-per-view theme song to put in my forever playlist, what would it be?
Second, which pay-per-view from the last five years is the best standalone experience?
Extreme Rules '12 was given as an example, and I would be hard-pressed to argue against it. The show had four classic matches interspersed with inoffensive filler. I can dig that. My choice, however, would be Money in the Bank '11. Both ladder matches were exquisite, the Hall of Pain began in earnest, Christian and Randy Orton had a fun brawl, the introduction of John Laurinaitis as a real character, and of course, Punk/Cena. The shot of Punk blowing the kiss to Vince McMahon was the cherry on the sundae.
@KevinNewburn asks if TNA is really going under, and if so, would it be good for pro wrestling on the whole.
For one, no, I don't think TNA's going to go under anytime soon. Even if Panda/the Carter family doesn't feel like pumping money into the company, I think Spike TV will. Impact is their highest rated program, and they lean on it to continue trying to make fetch happen, fetch being Bellator MMA in this case. Now, would their closing be good for wrestling? Yes and no. Yes in that the worst labor offenders in pro wrestling history would be out of business. But again, wrestlers in the short term would be out of a paycheck. All the office workers, not the executives, but the secretaries, marketing, sales, they'd all be out paychecks. With no lock for a company to replace TNA on the national scene, I would be capricious to say that their demise would be 100% a good thing.
@Jessico09 asks who has the worst gimmick in the WWE?
I want to say Los Matadores, but they haven't debuted yet. They could definitely have kitsch factor going for them, even if they have the stigma of being the "Vince McMahon is kind of a bigot and only has certain gimmicks available for ethnic folk" specials. I'll excuse them for now. Rob van Dam's "Hero of the Latinos" isn't so much a gimmick, but it's such a ridiculous trope that it deserves mention. The worst gimmick though? If I can delve into NXT, CJ Parker's hippie gimmick is pretty lame.
@chudleycannons has a whole mess of EPL related questions. Did I choose Cardiff City as my team, how early do I wake up to watch EPL, and what is an "international break?"
First, I'm gonna take this season to choose between the Cardiff City Corgis and Aston Villa (I know Cardiff City's name isn't the Corgis. Shut up.). Whatever team loses out will probably end up getting my secondary support anyway, but I feel like I need more than a couple of weeks to decide.
I don't need to get up too early to watch EPL, because they have games on at 10AM and 12PM Eastern. However, getting up with TJ means that I can get up for the early games too. The slate starts at 7AM Eastern.
Finally, international break is when European leagues adjourn to play in tournaments like the Champions League. The concept is still a little foreign to me because I'm so used to American sporting constructs, but hey, it'll let me catch up on rasslin' on Saturday mornings in September.
Finally, @Kenzaki24 asks if all things are equal, will the Flyers bounce back this year?
I think forecasting the team this year is pretty hard based on the free agent moves. The team downgraded nearly everywhere, and Claude Giroux got hurt on the friggin' golf course. However, hockey's a weird sport, and teams as skittish as the Flyers benefit from longer seasons where they have more of a chance to catch fire. I don't know if they're a better team than last year, and with the Red Wings and Blue Jackets coming over to Eastern Conference, so I don't know if a rebound is necessarily in order. However, the Flyers could progress back to the mean, and I wouldn't put regression past the Islanders. So who the fuck knows?