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| According to Babinsack, that outfit got Davina Rose signed Photo Credit: Gregory Davis/DDS |
Enter Joe Babinsack, who wrote a review for SHIMMER Vol. 44 that is on the front page of F4W Online today, on May 11, 2013. To recap, SHIMMER recently filmed vol. 57. Vol. 44 was taped on October 11, 2011. I know back DVD sales can drive business and all, but 19 months of lag time on a review for the biggest hub for wrestling journalism in America seems to be getting off on the wrong foot altogether. But hey, maybe the review is good...
Joe Babinsack looks at Shimmer 44
Well, that's a wonderful start. Not "SHIMMER 44 Review" with a byline that says "by Joe Babinsack." Nope, JOE BABINSACK IS THE MAIN EVENT BECAUSE THE CULT OF THE WRITER IS GREATER THAN THE PROMOTION HE'S COVERING. Oh, sorry. Anyway.
I gave up on figuring out what “Rate Tank” means long ago. But by any name, Kellie Skater is a solid worker. I guess her ‘work rate’ can be compared to an engine of war.
Looks like he just figured out what "Rate Tank" means in two sentences.
Either that, or there’s some sort of Australian idiom I’m woefully ignorant of.
Oh, there are a lot of things he's ignorant about there, buddy.
Davina Rose has that girl-next-door look, and there’s no surprise she got signed up to a developmental deal with the WWE based on looks and ability, selling and action, and especially that red velour outfit, even from seeing her in one match.
I'd be more pissed off that a man is insinuating that dressing like what he imagines as a slut is the most key thing of getting into WWE if I didn't think in the back of my mind that was how developmental contracts for women were handed out. That being said, holy shit, that's incomprehensible to me how anyone can write that sentence in 2013 unless they were writing for wrestling or sport. "We still have a long way to go" ought to be a mantra.
Brief interview segment with Sassy Stephie and a dark haired Neveah. I’d comment that the announcer looks like one of my in-laws, but I’d probably get in trouble.
Hey, why not, he already insinuated that the thing that got Davina Rose her developmental deal was her saucy attire. Go all the way and shame the interviewer, who has a name, by the by.
Veda has a very cool look but Taylor Made has a more mainstream appeal, evern with the multicolored and crimped hairdo. Wow, I’m asking for trouble talking about hairstyles.
If a guy is asking for trouble about talking about hairstyles in a pro wrestling review, he may just want to lay off talking about hairstyles in a wrestling review.
I’m surprised to be saying this, but Neveah was better as a blonde… but Ashley Lane pulls off the darker hair.
I'm sorry, is this F4W Online, or is it the fucking Vidal Sassoon Hair Care Blog?
Maybe I’m misremembering something. The Sassy one is great as ever.
Mia Yim is Mia Yim.
Another match where SHIMMER brings that episodic nature like few other promotions, as the battling of the former partners becomes a backdrop for this match, and a tease of a bigger feud exploding on the scene.
So, what actually happened in thsi match? Who won? Was there a finish? Or is he more interested in how people look in their hair?
Getting back to “struggle” and I’m still wondering why a talented lady that shaved her head couldn’t be kept on the roster, why a talented lady who changed her look can’t get hired to do what she’s best at, and there’s another gal on the card who’s also deserving of mainstream recognition.
But that’s a struggle true wrestling fans have these days.
LOL, true wrestling fans. This guy is just priceless. Most of the review so far has been based on the looks of the wrestlers, with only two out of the five matches getting any kind of synopsis outside of the finish (one of which not even getting that dignity), and he has the gall to wonder why WWE and TNA didn't or don't appreciate Serena Deeb and Ashley "Madison Rayne" Lane?
Cruise looks like an Amazon, and Mena Libra (whom I recognize from AAW) is slightly shorter but powerfully built. (By the way, don’t confuse Cruise with Christopher Cruise or Amazon with the shopping website). Bonesaw now sports dreadlocks, and has that Homicide vibe.
The babyface quartet has the always fashionable Danger, the even more outrageously fashionable Bates, Von Eerie with a warhawk and MsChif as herself.
Oh yeah, She Nay Nay seems out of place with a weirder name and a less than powerful physique, but that catsuit (and no, I don’t mean to reference Cat Power) is quite the attraction.
This is a fun multiple wrestler match with solid heel/face overtones.
"Why don't real wrestling fans get to see women shine in WWE or TNA. Okay, let's run down the next match by describing how everyone looks and nothing more."
Eagles is very tall.
I tap.
Y'know, writing a review shouldn't leave the readers guessing what the fuck happened in each match and play Joan Rivers with how everyone looked. It should be to provide a descriptive review of a show and why someone should see or not see it. I don't give a flying shit if Neveah looked better as a blonde or if your misogynistic ass thinks Davina Rose got signed because of red velour gear.
It's par for the course for F4W Online, a site that has printed that "Evan Bourne is in Las Vegas looking for UFC tickets: as wrestling news or who jumped the gun reporting that The Rock left Newark in a huff over creative direction when he was flying back to Los Angeles to get an injury looked at. I'm not surprised they'd print this pap. But it doesn't mean it's acceptable in the least.
It goes back to the whole attitude. F4W Online, I imagine, is a pretty lucrative business with money that can get these shows for their reviewers in a timely manner. I'd say before this interview, Dave Prazak would have been glad to hand over screener copies to the site. Now, I'm not so sure anyone would blame him if he embargoed them and made them buy like everyone else. People wonder why I have such a "hate boner" against the sheets like the one run by Meltzer and Alvarez. Well, when they put themselves at the vanguard, it's embarrassing to me when I say I am a wrestling writer. I don't want to associate with them when they allow something as god-awful produced by a stunted manchild of a writer on their site.