 |
| Nikki Bella doesn't look like the kind of person who thinks her boyfriend's wrestling career is in jeopardy Photo Credit: WWE.com |
To be honest, though, this episode doesn't really do a good job of anything. There is a fudging of continuity anyway in this universe, but it's never done with such incoherence. The storylines are not that bad in terms of the involvement of the men, but even on a show where it's hard to buy into the reality we're being sold, so much of it just felt like a poor suspension of disbelief. So I'll slowly talk about it.
1. Daniel Bryan
None of the Divas had particularly strong episodes, so give it to the guy who won the title (in his famous ten minute victory) and said the world "shart" on national television.
2. Brie Bella
She didn't do all that much, either, but having her fingers up and her boyfriend's shirt is legitimately adorable.
3. Nikki Bella
For what it's worth, Nikki has become one of the more archetypal characters on the show, at times swaying between confident and mean. Yet this episode proves that she actually has a flair for her character. Nikki Bella may not understand professional wrestling, but Nikki Bella understands Nikki Bella. And an episode without much of that is certainly lesser than the Nikki who thought wine had antioxidants.
4. John Cena
Oh no, will John Cena retire from that injury he has!?
5. Vincent
I'm doing a 180 on Ariane's boyfriend Vincent. This episode showed how fantastic he can be when he's let loose. When most of his responses to virtually anything is to dance in as dorky a way as possible (aka the Trey Irby Special), it is wonderful. Never change, you weird sort of annoying glorious confusing man.
6. Trinity
Not even a well placed quip at something? Trin's losing it, y'all.
7. Ariane
I don't hate Ari's wanton attitude, but I did find peeling back the layers to why Ariane is this kind of angry defensive being to be interesting. Still, it kind of left me colder than I had hoped. More "Babe, STOP" and "Girl bye" next time?
8. Natalya
Maybe I've been internetting too much, but any time I see Natalya, I immediately think of the weird moment on Raw where she doesn't know what to do, and the weird botch finishes where she doesn't know what to do, and the gambit of this episode (Nattie peeing on herself in-ring) where the real Nattie doesn't know what to do. Then Alicia Fox laughs at her and you get enraged that this Nattie has no spine. She's upset that they told her to do something, but doesn't say no even when it wouldn't be a big deal. Story of her life. She's seemed to make her bed.
9. Jojo
But in a true moment of living Butt Monkey, Jojo appears for maybe 10 seconds on the whole episode. Oh, by the way, this is the episode devoted to Summerslam. At Summerslam, Jojo sung the national anthem. This was all ignored in favor of the least interesting "fan favorite" feud in reality television history. Poor Jojo.
10. Eva Marie
It takes a lot to not even be able to be a mean asshole properly. Eva Marie, whose new fandom is represented by two plants in the crowd that seem to actually like her, is touting her appearance in Maxim. Oh, by the way, name the last ten Maxim cover girls. You can Google if you like, but that probably proves the point. The mags don't matter. But anyway, Eva is trying to become Brie's tag partner (because I guess she doesn't understand genetics?). She also says the phrase "fan favorite" like someone whose only knowledge of wrestling was the Team EPIC WAR promo from the 2009 King of Trios, where Austin Aries says "fans" a thousand times as a joke. Ugh.